Sadopassana
Let’s begin by sitting nice and relaxed, taking a few deep breaths, and removing our shirts, so that our shoulders are bare. Gently close the eyes, turn the head to the left, and begin to kiss the shoulder…Now, being careful not to strain the neck, nestle the nose in the armpit, and little by little, move the face around and about, enjoying the softness and the warmth. Breathe in deeply through the nose, and again, to connect with the scent … maybe it’s a little sweet… maybe it’s a little spicy. This is the very smell of our essence, one of the nine Sacred Shmeiki Signatures of being, which I’ll say more about another time. Now do the same with the other shoulder. Kiss it…nestle the nose…move it around…and inhale.. Spend some time moving between armpits. Notice how the smell is a little different in each…
…Aaand rest.
Now, I want to talk about Shminky Shmantra within the framework of pleasure and pain, and control and submission.
Pleasure is the physical experience of joy. When we are flowing with life, we find it in limitless ways, light and shadow, the tangy crunch of an apple, the tinkling of a mountain stream, Miri Aloni singing at Kikar Magen David.
But are we addicted to pleasure? Is it a problem? Well, if there is no contrast, no difference between background and foreground, no un-pleasurable thing to compare the pleasure with, then the senses become numb. We only have to fast for a day, to find that hunger is the best of cooks.
What helps drive this addiction to pleasure, is our fear of pain. But tornados and tsunamis are violent. Animals hunt with claws, teeth and venom, and attack when they feel threatened. In every group, there are hostile and sometimes fatal power struggles.
Fear of violence, whilst natural, separates us from the fullness of life. As spiritual people, we look to transcend violence, to live on a higher, peaceful, plane, but in doing so, might we not be living in denial of our darker sides, which in some cases need to experience inflicting or receiving pain?
The urge for violence and the urge for sex can become intertwined within the murky depths of our subconscious. Part of sex is all about control and submission, and in man’s complexity, there are places, where the opposites of pain and pleasure meet. Some call it perversion. In Shmeiki, we prefer to call it Shminkiness.
I once witnessed a rather mundane show at the then Dungeon Nightclub in Tel Aviv. It involved a queen hoisting her slave on a crane, sticking a lit candle up his bottom, and proceeding to beat him with a variety of implements, to the rhythm of the music. What was more interesting than the show, was the Haredi man in the gallery upstairs, who was transfixed by the proceedings. I was impressed he could be so liberal. That was, until the show finished, and the slave kneeled in front of his queen and bowed to her, and the Haredi man in the gallery clasped his hands over his eyes in disgust. I wonder what would have happened if he’d met Yona Vollach, and she’d asked him to “put the tefillin in my mouth, a bridle bit, ride me I am a mare…”
In New Age circles, to varying degrees, the guru / follower relationship revolves around control and submission. For many, coming to a guru is a way to return to a blissful, childhood state, where decisions are made for us, and we can go beyond our egos, by trusting guruji, obeying guruji, bowing to guruji, and sometimes touching or kissing his feet. This power exchange is best temporary. Of course, for me to successfully adopt the role of Shmeiki Baba, you must accept to listen as followers, otherwise it simply won’t work – you’ll say, “Who the hell do you think you are talking to?”
As humans there are three states we can approach each other from: Child, friend, or parent. If there is any crossover, both sides must correspond. For example, if two friends of similar status meet, and one wishes to receive guidance, the interaction can only function, if the friend who is required to give guidance, switches to play the role of parent. If he wishes to stay in the role of friend, he might say, ‘grow up, you’ve got to decide this for yourself.’ What’s healthy is to acknowledge which position we are acting from, and to be able to switch between roles, without getting stuck in just one.
But where is all this inherent violence we’ve been talking about? Sometimes it is not evident; it often remains in the collective subconscious, because its uncomfortable to talk about, and easier to deny. And here lies a danger, and the open door to manipulation and abuse. If there is a will to suffer, there is no need to walk down any lonely, ascetic path of broken glass, with a self effacing bow – holy, shmoly, no, there are lots of enjoyable ways we can get our masochistic kicks! And for this reason, we use the compassionate, loving environment of Shminky Shmantra to explore physical and mental violence, as a consensual game with friends and loved ones. Here, a blow from a whip, is like the blow of the Zen master’s stick. It brings us to the present.
Let’s practice a simply introductory Shmechnique, now. It is called the face slapping circle.
Move into a circle. Now Ronen, would you like to begin by smacking the face of Sara sitting on your left.
It needs to be a proper slap, open handed and with a relaxed flexible wrist. Do not punch and avoid hitting the ear. Sara accept the blow, it is only a sting. Watch any thoughts arising. So begin.
- Er, I can’t hit a woman
- Ronen, that is only programming. Break the taboo.
Ok, here goes.
Ouch.
Now continue around the circle.
Slap. Ouch. Slap. Ouch. Slap. Ouch. Slap. Ouch.
Ouch. Wow, Shoham that was hard. Did you notice how it got stronger and stronger?
Feel free to play this game later by yourselves. The only rule to consider is that you are not allowed to return the slap to the person who hit you, you must give it someone else, which means you have to play with more than two people.
Ok, the next exercise is over the knee spanking. Who doesn’t like a nice spank? Split into pairs. Take turns to spank each other. If you find its getting out of hand, and you want your partner to stop hitting you, say ‘om Shmeiki.’
Spankers, never descend into anger or frenzy. Each blow, is a meditative reminder to you too. Focus on the sign of health and vitality, as your partner’s ass becomes red, and remember that ultimately there is no difference between his ass and yours.
For people who really want to get into this more, you might be interested in the Shmeiki Sadopassana Course taking place in February in Israel. Here we get to explore Shminky Shmantra deeply, with various meditations and techniques of control and submission, including pain, humiliation, restraints, and leather clothing. The new Shmeiki GSM electric shock machine TM will also be featured at this event. It is a genital attachment worn by all participants, which is able to deliver an electric shock. The device comes with a small antenna, and is activated by mobile phone. In Sadopassana, when one person makes a mistake, everyone gets the shock. What fun! Any Questions?